So i’m not *quite* a D cup. I’ve a boyish figure. It’s as well my gals are so small and humble, just in case you were to accidentally confuse them with mountains. That would be disasterous. I would not want planes crashing into my chest nor climbers falling to their deaths. Crampons? Ouch.
As you can see, I enjoy wearing my new purchases, although the pasties were a little sore getting off. I will no longer be consuming high fat fast food come a week or so, so fingers crossed the manly excess around my middle will disappear. Aaand lose the less manly deposits on my thighs and arms and I will get back to be being more boyish and toned. Stress is a wonderful thing. I’m usually okay with my body (I have the usual amounts of flab hang ups) but looking at photos from my holiday I am a bit concerned. Not everyone agrees with me on this though.
My Dear Texan said upon spying me that I looked “quite the hottie” and questioned how I must feel with all these men staring at me all the time. Cue derisory laughter from myself. Men? Interested? Me? I am popular with lesbians but straight men seem to be interested much less frequently. I did however manage to get myself recruited to work at American Apparel (of course only the beautiful people work there) but the minor fact that I did not live in the US was a bit of an issue. I also really don’t have a body like any of the true hotties on their website. Really.
I think I shall accessorise my piratical garb with the pasties. I think I need some spirit gum, although I could try Pritt Stick.
