Fuck this harder

I’m fed up of pretending to teach and basically being an expensive cover supervisor. I do not see the point in really bothering very much to crack the whip and make the kids get through the work set; quite frequently I figure keeping them inside the four walls of the classroom is an accomplishment in itself.

When kids ask me if I was perfect at school when I complain about their behaviour I always answer in the negative- I didn’t do my homework every time, I used to slack off, etc. However, I would never take the piss out of a teacher, try and fuck with them and get away with stuff and I would always show respect to whomever was teaching me. I would also not need to be asked six times to be quiet.

It pisses me off to think that there will be teachers who think I have no classroom control abilities- Its simply because i’m supply and do not know the kids or the system. I often find it tough to keep kids quiet and on task so I basically give up; there’s only so many times you should have to wait for the kids to stop their conversations so that you can speak- ZERO.

If it’s the choice between letting the kids talk in the background whilst I try and explain and having to stop and wait every 20 seconds or so eventually I go with the former. Then of course the kids who were engrossed in their own conversations repeatedly ask what they are supposed to be doing as they don’t know, I get annoyed at their rudeness and my repetition and my anger levels go up- although I am very conscious to keep it in check and patiently explain the task the three or more times they need to attempt to grasp it.

So if i’m going to avoid the situation where I spend 30-45 minutes out of an hour lesson just trying to get through the explanation and tell the kids what to do, I give up. The way I see it is that it’s only one day so what’s the point? Let them talk all lesson if they want, let them finish their homework. They don’t pay any attention to me because i’m supply, female and young- “Aw. She’s only a couple a years older than us!” (try ten years, you waste-of-space) so what the fuck can I really do?

I took a day off today so I could visit my old placement school to work on their website. I was essentially working for free as I didn’t accomplish very much of what I set out to do (not through any fault of my own) which was frustrating. I’m spending at least fourty-five minutes tomorrow morning travelling to a school filled with fairly crap kids when I could be spending ten minutes travelling to “supervise” crap children. A lettings agency has fucked me over.

I couldn’t find the Topshop underwear I was after. I’m getting a sneaking feeling I care for MW#1 in a way that he does not care for me, and there’s not much I can do about it apart from feel glum and think too much.

It’s all bollocks, bollocks I tell you.

I call SHENANIGANS.